You Should Probably Be More Extroverted
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Highlights
- Though I’m a good writer, my primary talent is a tendency towards extroversion. Extroversion is an unreasonably effective life strategy, and I naturally adopt it to an unusual degree.
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There was, however, one secret to my strategy: it wasn’t a strategy. I had no goals other than making friends and seeking attention. When I thought someone was interesting, I talked to them more. It didn’t matter whether they were a litigator, drug dealer, video store clerk, homeless person, or professor. Although I occasionally approached someone with an end in mind, it didn’t generally go well, so I mostly stopped doing it. And it turns out that people present you with opportunities even when that’s not what you’re looking for.
- This is another reason to approach conversations without specific intent. Bringing an agenda to a conversation restricts the horizon of possibility to your preconceptions. This is often detrimental. People are a lot more surprising (and they tend to like you more) when you’re not after their utility.
- There’s no real way to game it, other than to hang out with the most interesting people you can find.
- Being extroverted can improve the freedom of association of everyone in your proximity, which can have amazingly multiplicative benefits.